I needed a break so I took one

I know I'm not alone in this. There's a lot of pressure on all of us. Sometimes we feel like we all have to do so much..... To just add on one more thing to your plate or squeeze in the energy to take care of someone else. As a mom I have a hard time delegating responsibilities even when I know I should. As a partner I feel like I should carry more of the daily burden of our household. As a doula I always feel like I could do more, give more, be more. As a daughter I want to provide more for my parents. Over the past few months I got to a point where I was just juggling too much and unfortunately I had to drop the things that didn't immediately provide a positive effect on my family.

The guilt. It was almost consuming. 

But I just could not handle anymore. I ignored the blog. I fell off social media except for my personal account. I turned down additional jobs on my scheduled off days. I asked my mom for more help with schlepping my son to different appointments. And I felt like a failure. I wallowed for a few days, I won't lie. But I took some time for me. 

I read more of those novels I love so much. I bought some decorative furniture I normally would put back to save money. I spent more time just talking to my son. We braved Hurricane Harvey (not fun, btw). I even met my friends up for a brunch we had been putting off for about a year lol. And guess what? 

All the extra shit was still there when I looked up again. Nothing fell apart. My sons grades are still good. The bills got paid. My blog is still here. My Instagram is active. Jobs are still pouring in. Nothing changed. 

I doubt I had any real break through but I'll gladly take it over having a break down. In promised myself I'm going to do a better job about prioritizing things in my life from now on. First thing I need to get a handle on is some serious self care. This week I'm getting a haircut and a damn pedicure. Then I'm going to have brunch with my best friends and after I've thoroughly enjoyed my weekend I'm going to jump back on the healthy eating train. If you've ever hunkered down during a natural disaster like a hurricane. You can attest to the junk you end up eating. You can definitely start strong with healthy foods but after a while that runs out and you're stuck eating junk that can live in your pantry for years without seeing the light of day. My gut is begging for a cleanse so I'm going to listen to ny body and push reset. I decided to make this a Keto friendly cleanse so I can jump back into that lifestyle. And then I'm going to take it one day at a time. Because if I don't take care of me, then I can't take care of everyone else. 

So, in short - I'm alive and I'm back. I'm putting together my Keto entries for those who are interested in my low carb high fat way of eating. They should be ready soon and I'm sure this upcoming cleanse (first cleanse I've ever attempted with Keto) will be interesting. 

But I'm going to take it easy on myself.

Love,

Alex